Day 13, 30 Days of Sober Sunrises

Day 13, Thursday, July 11th, 5:48 am

Today is not how I pictured I would feel. Skies on the horizon are bluish grey, thick, I can see the sun's pink light just peering through the clouds on the horizon.

Strong winds, moderate waves, loud.

Things can change just like that.

One minute you are sharing photos of your cute rainbow unicorn pajama shirt and the next you are telling your husband his sister has died.

My sister in law T, was found deceased in her apartment yesterday, and the police called me and I picked up the phone and received the first news of this shattering heart breaking news.

I feel so sad and heavy and disturbed.

And as I watch the sun and the sky this morning and a beautiful teeny spot of the most vibrant and dynamic color and shapes and rays appear a-mist the dark clouds, I think at least she's at peace and that is beauty, a sliver of peace nestled in the dark looming clouds that are taking over the rest of the horizon.

T loved her dogs so much and they gave her years of joy, love and purpose.

She was also so very smart and was a published researcher in some of the initial studies of the COVID-19 virus at UNC, Chapel Hill. 

She loved her one-wheel and found fun and joy wheeling all over town.

She liked to hike and kayak and be outside.

She overcame so many obstacles and survived long after most with her same conditions.

She was funny, and creative, and had somewhat of a twisted sense of humor.

I know she did love her family and parents especially her nieces and nephews, my husband, her siblings and her aunts and uncles. 

It's a terrible, terrible loss.

I hope she is remember for being a strong fighter, an advocate for animals, and her contribution to COVID-19 research.

We love you T, and we are so sorry. We hope you are flying free now and finally have some sustained peace.

Oracle, For T: Hummingbird Spirit, Joy
Replenish yourself. True happiness comes from following the dictates of your soul. Life is change.

How can this be the card today?

I will not fight it. I was the card I was supposed to pick and share.

In T's honor, I will share and find joy and every time I see a hummingbird, I will think of her with joy.




I will be heading back to my home in Chapel Hill to be with my husband, in-laws and family.. the 30-days of Sober Sunrises over the ocean might need to take a pause, we will see. 
❤️

Angela Mascenik
www.angelamascenik.com/aliveaf
Stop Over-drinking and Start Living Podcast
Certified Stop Over-drinking Coach
🌅 🌅 🌅 🌅

About the 30 days of Sober Sunrise Project:

These entries are dedicated to my 6th year of living an alcohol-free life. I have discovered that I love sunrises in my new life. So, I decided to do a writing project of documenting 30-days of sober sunrises over the Atlantic ocean. I rented a house within walking distance to Carolina Beach to make this happen. My family and a few friends will be rotating in and out during this time.

I have no agenda or goal about the outcome. I am curious and fascinated about what might happen.

But most importantly, I just happy that I gave myself the chance for this to even be possible. I am thankful for every person who has helped me get here, past and present, good and bad. They all played a role and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't the experiences in my life (even all the excessive drinking) before this very moment. Let's see what happens! 

[Scroll down and CLICK 'Back to Blog List' below to read the previous entries]